How to talk to your child about your Mental Health

What mental health needs is more sunlight, more candor, more unashamed conversation.

- Glenn Close

Parents often hesitate to tell their children that they are seeking therapy. It's driven by the desire to shield their kids from adult challenges and recognizing the stigma around mental health. While telling your child about your traumatic experience may be too much, sharing with them that you are receiving treatment can be very helpful for both of you.

Why?

Research consistently shows that a parent's mental health significantly impacts a child's well-being (Michals, 2023). Children are perceptive and may sense when something is different. Explaining your therapy journey can alleviate confusion and prevent misconceptions.

According to the American Psychological Association, open communication about mental health can reduce stigma and encourage children to seek help when they need. By sharing your therapy journey, you can teach your child valuable lessons about self-care, it is okay to seek help, and talking about mental health is as necessary as physical health.

How to Approach the Conversation:

Be Honest and Age-Appropriate

Tailor your explanation to your child's age and maturity level. Younger children need simpler explanations, while older kids and teens can handle more detailed information.

For example, you might say to a young child, "I'm talking to someone to help me feel better," while to a teen, you could explain, "I'm seeing a therapist to work through depression/anxiety etc."

This need not be a formal, serious conversation. It can start off as a casual conversation and continue from there.

Encourage Questions 

Allow your child to ask questions and express their feelings. A child may ask:

• “Are you sick?”

• “Why do you need therapy?”

• “Does this mean I will need therapy too?”

Answer their queries honestly and reassure them that it's okay to talk about emotions and mental health.

A healthy choice

• Therapy is a form of treatment for mental illness for some individuals, and it is a journey of self-discovery and growth for others.

• You can elaborate on how visiting therapists can help us take care of our mental health in the same way that regular exercise does for our physical health.

• Seeking for help and learning skills to manage emotions better are a sign of strength not weakness. These normalizes the experience and presents it as a positive, healthy choice.

The Benefits of Transparency

The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) notes that children who understand mental health are more likely to seek help themselves and support others. Self-acceptance is central to your journey towards mental wellness, but just as significant is getting acceptance from loved ones.  

Therapy and Family Impact

Research suggests that nearly 15% of the Indian population suffers from some form of mental health issue, including anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, substance use disorders, and neurodevelopmental disorders (Hossain & Purohit, 2019). It is important for kids to know family history as mental illness can be hereditary. By learning about your mental health journey, they can take preventive measures or recognize early signs, helping them manage their mental health more effectively.

 Summary

1. Be honest and use age-appropriate language.

3. Highlight the positives and normalize therapy.

4. Encourage questions and open dialogue.

Encourage ongoing talk about mental health within your family. Fostering an environment of openness and support can have lasting positive impacts on your child's well-being.

Sources

American Psychological Association (APA). Children. [Internet]. 2022. Available from https://www.apa.org/topics/children/mental-health

Hossain, M. M., & Purohit, N. (2019). Improving child and adolescent mental health in India: Status, services, policies, and way forward. Indian journal of psychiatry, 61(4), 415–419. https://doi.org/10.4103/psychiatry.IndianJPsychiatry_217_18

Michals, S., & Reeder, K. (2023). Parental Mental Health Impacts a Child’s Well-being: Parent-focused Interventions Can Help. Journal of Student Research.